Friday, September 15, 2006

Rainy Days and Mondays Get Me Down

Also? Fridays when I have a ton of work to do and have come down with a nasty cold. Blech.

Also? For some reason? The fact that another woman at work is pregnant. She hasn't told us yet, but I saw that she was wearing maternity pants yesterday and she's definitely starting to show. I'm really happy for her. Babies are exciting! But for some reason it made me cry. I think I'm jealous.

We're not even trying yet, and it still kind of scares the crap out of me. In fact, the longer we wait, the more frightened about becoming a mom I get. I'm scared of the pregnancy, I'm scared of being a mom, I'm scared of how it will change my relationship with my husband, I'm scared of its effects on my bank account, and I'm scared about how it will affect my body. I'm really just scared. To top it all off, we're thinking about moving far away within the next year, so I don't know if I'd want to do that hugely pregnant or with a newborn.

But I'm definitely jealous, and every time I see a baby I positively melt. I think I'm ready to be a mom, no matter how scared of it I am. Now I just have to convince Aaron. Seeing how he reacts to babies lately, I don't think it will be too hard.


At 9/15/2006 1:19 PM, Blogger Rude Cactus said...

I hope you know being scared crapless is par for the course. Hell, I have one now and I'm still freaked out. These things work themselves out though.

At 9/15/2006 3:52 PM, Blogger Mrs. Flinger said...

You're never actually ready. I freaked out COMPLETELY at eight months pregnant like, "WHAT THE HELLLLL!!!" And again at one day post partum, one month, one month one day.. you get the idea.

But you get it, you get in to the swing of it and it's awesome. You'll be ready when it happens. Even if you are scared. :-)

At 9/17/2006 10:59 AM, Anonymous donna said...

I agree with Mrs. Finger. I don't think there is such a thing as "ready" but in my case (not preaching) I reached the point where I wanted it more than I was scared of it, and that's when I knew it was time to try. Of course, for us, it took a long time to get here, which hopefully will not happen to you. And I'm ten weeks away from having this kid and have my freaked out days where I think this was a completely bad idea, but deep down, I know that it wasn't and I am happy about it. I say just start talking about the concepts before you approach him with "I want to have a baby now!" Becoming a dad is scary to them too!

And I think you'll be a GREAT mom!

At 9/26/2006 2:57 PM, Blogger Julie said...

Ready? You mean women are actually ready? Okay, there may be a few. But usually I have only heard of the ones that are freaking out.

It will be an adjustment for both of you. But I have seen couples become even closer after having a baby. (We won't discuss the others.)

You will be fine. Babysit for someone, it will get the jealousy out of your system for a little bit. :)


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